


A Small Tangle

by athos



Series: Strands of a Braid [2]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Alien Gender/Sexuality, And turn them on their head, Gen, Gender, Let's examine gender assumptions made in ME, Mostly Dialog, Xenophilia, discussion of biological genders in aliens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 06:41:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16080581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/athos/pseuds/athos
Summary: Jaal discovers that many Milky Way species have 'genders', and many of the Tempest's crew are suddenly reminded of their unconscious biases.Takes place once Sara and Jaal have become trusted friends, but before their romantic relationship begins.





	A Small Tangle

**Author's Note:**

> AN- so, I have a problem wherein I have a whole story in which I have used he/him pronouns for Jaal, because that’s what the game does, and when I used that convention I didn’t know I’d be adding this to my headcanon. Essentially, the angara are mono-gendered like the asari, only their bodies change when they decide to have children and become mothers. But I noticed that I keep using he/his when writing Jaal, and I talk about pronouns in this chapter and provide a reason for why the human characters refer to Jaal as he/him, but what pronouns would 3rd-person narration Jaal use for himself? This lazy author will continue to use he/his/him for Jaal because (1) it’s established in the writing and canon already and (2) lazy. If you’ve never thought much about your own gender identity, you likely think I’m thinking about this WAY too much--which is possible. But I wanted my readers to know that I am thinking about it; I’m just not sure what to do. 
> 
> Another way to look at it-- I’m making up lore-based reasons for game-developer decisions, and I wanted reasons that weren’t “because the gender binary is a universal constant”. I also wanted to establish that the angara--in my headcanon and this fic--are not confined to traditional human gender roles, either socially or anatomically, to give me more options in the kinky smuttery to follow in later sections. 
> 
> I want to acknowledge the tumblr post that got me thinking about this - https://athos-silvani.tumblr.com/post/169622182487/what-she-says-im-fine-what-she-really-means-the  
> Please read the post-- scifi and fanfic give us these amazing opportunities to explore things. I'm certain that I (a cis queer woman) still show plenty of unconscious biases here, and I haven't explored the issues raised in this post as much as I could, but honestly, it's difficult, and complicated, and 100% worthwhile, and if you have different ideas or want to see different things, white it and tell me about it!

Jaal strolled through the tavetaan on his way to meet Evfra, and paused to take in the view. It was familiar, of course, and the familiarity of it soothed him like nothing else but his family. He enjoyed the Tempest and his crewmates, and had begun to see them as friends, but the unfamiliarity of their shapes, their voices, the ship layout… As welcoming and comfortable as they made it for him, coming to Aya was like slipping into a warm lake, like redirecting a current snagged on a pulled muscle.

‘Evfra can wait a few minutes,’ he told himself, leaning against the railing. As his eyes took in the jungles and flowing lava, his mind wandered, and his ears picked up a curious conversation from two mothers behind him.

“What’s a gender?” one asked.

“It’s a biological and sociological distinction, but I think one gender bears children and the other doesn’t,” said the other. Jaal thought he recognized the voice from the museum.

“Well, that’s like us--mothers and those of us who haven’t borne young.”

“No, they-- it’s more complicated than that. It’s not something you can change, and it seems like some of them project much more onto their ‘gender’ than having children or not. It also effects the words they use to refer to each other.”

“Their names?”

“No, the pronouns.”

“So, someone is a mother, or not, regardless of whether they had children? Always?”

“That’s not the word they use, but I think so?”

“How odd.”

Jaal hummed. Odd indeed. Fortunately, he knew who to ask for more information.

 

* * *

 

Jaal walked out of the tech lab and saw Suvi, Vetra, and Lexi standing around the table. He intended only to ask Lexi, reasoning that a physician would have the clearest information, but he decided that having more input couldn’t possibly hurt. He cleared his throat, and they looked up at him.

“Good morning, Jaal!” Suvi greeted him.

“Good morning. I have a question.” He waited for them to nod their acceptance and asked, “What is a gender?”

They were all silent a moment. Vetra blinked in the slow way that suggested she was surprised. “Woah.”

Suvi sipped her drink. “Not what I expected.”

“I ask because...well,” Jaal cleared his throat again. “I have heard others of your kind refer to “male” or “female” angara, but we do not understand this distinction. And I overheard two mothers at the tavetaan wondering about it, and one said it was about the capacity to bear young, as though not every turian or human can do so.”

Suvi’s jaw dropped. “Oh, my god,” she breathed.

Vetra looked concerned. “Suvi?”

Suvi’s eves were wide. “I am a terrible scientist,” she declared.

Lexi looked at Jaal with fascination. “You’re not the only one. I’m so used to working among gendered species that I overlooked it, too.”

“Wait, so, angara don’t have different genders?” Vetra asked, brow plates close together. Jaal had quickly learned that this was her ‘thinking face’, as Cora had put it.

Jaal shrugged. “I’m still not clear on what that means.”

Lexi straightened and said, “Well, many Milky Way species divide themselves into genders, their position on the spectrum between male and female. In general, biologically, female members of a species have the capability to become pregnant and bear young, our children. They need biological material input from males of the species to become fertile-- the making of a child requires both pieces, and most individuals biologically only have one piece.”

During Lexi’s explanation, Liam and Gil walked in from Engineering. Liam looked up from his pad and asked, “Jaal, is Lexi really explaining the birds and the bees to you, pal?”

Jaal frowned. “What is a--”

“Nevermind that right now,” Suvi interrupted. “Jaal, gender for Milky Way species is often about more than just biology. Over the centuries, there’s been a lot of social expectations--”

“Social baggage, more like,” muttered Gil, leaning on the table next to Vetra.

“--around one’s gender, like gender stereotypes.”

Gender stereotypes? Jaal frowned. Perhaps more input was not better for this discussion.

“Speak for yourself!” exclaimed Lexi, raising a painted eyebrow.

“...right,” Suvi whispered into her mug.

Lexi continued, “Humans, krogan, salarians, and turians tend toward a gender binary, and reproduction generally requires one of each biological gender type. Asari are mono-gendered. All of us have the capability to give biological reproductive material without bearing offspring, and to also bear the offspring itself.”

“Socially it’s a bit more complicated. For humans, at least.” Gil looked at Liam for confirmation. “Five, six hundred years ago, men had to be one way and women had to be another, and god forbid you cross the streams.”

“Even more recently than that, in some places. Our gender stereotypes were/are pretty limiting. Like, males were always stronger and more aggressive, and females were always more nurturing and submissive,” Liam explained.

Jaal looked at them in confused fascination. “How do you tell male from female?”

Most of them looked taken aback, but Lexi just shook her head with a smile.

“That was...a strange question to walk in on,” said Kallo, who walked in from the bridge followed by PeeBee and Cora.

“No kidding,” Peebee said.

“And this is where it’ll get awkward,” Vetra predicted, “because humans get funny about talking about what’s between their legs.” Liam and Gil proved her right by shuffling their feet awkwardly. Suvi sipped again from a mug that Jaal strongly suspected was now empty.

Lexi broke the ensuing silence with a sigh. “Humans, turians, and krogan show sexual dimorphism-- males and females have different physiologies, internally and externally.”

“And the shape of your body determines what part you take in reproduction, but also more than that?” Jaal asked slowly, working around the strange concepts.

“Yes,” said Lexi,Gil, and Vetra, while Liam and Suvi said, “Kind of?”

“Biologically, yes, most of the time. Socially, it depends on the species and the individual,” clarified Cora. “For example, I am biologically a human female, and socially I identify as female. From the outside I look biologically female because I have…” she looked down at herself, “well, breasts, and my genitals are female.”

Jaal looked where she indicated. “Under your clothes?”

“Yes.”

“But if you always wear clothes, how do you-- nevermind. Who else is a human female?” Jaal asked.

“This is the best conversation,” whispered PeeBee to Lexi.

“Me and Sara are,” Suvi said.

“And I’m a female turian,” added Vetra, “but we don’t have breasts.”

“And breasts are the...fleshy bumps on your chests and one should not touch without permission?” said Jaal.

“Right,” confirmed Suvi and Cora at the same time.

Jaal frowned at Gil, who put up his hands and stepped away from the table. He then turned to Liam and said, “But Liam has breasts-- I have seen them!”

“Those are pecs, not breasts,” Liam said.

“Ha! Jaal thinks you have tits,” snickered Gil.

“Best. Conversation. Ever,” said Peebee.

“When did you see Liam-- oh, was this the armor swap thing?” asked Vetra.

“Really, though,” Cora said loudly, getting Jaal’s attention, “external gender characteristics are sometimes useful, sometimes not. It’s all relative to an average. For example, most male humans have stronger upper bodies than female humans, but I’m stronger than Gil.”

“Says who?” objected Gil.

“Says the box of bolts that fell on your head yesterday.”

Gil scowled. “It was on a high shelf!”

Suvi sighed and gestured at them. “And _this_ is an example of a deeply-ingrained social expectation around gender: that men are stronger than women, and a man should be ashamed if he’s less strong than a woman.”

“I didn’t--” Gill stopped. “Was I just unconsciously complicit in my own gender stereotyping because of socially conditioned, unexamined sexism?”

“I’m afraid so,” Suvi said sympathetically.

“God dammit!”

“And some humans’ individual gender identity isn’t male or female,” said Liam. “It can be both, or a combination, or neither. Had a couple mates in HUSTL like that. Really confused our Turian counterparts.”

“Turians don’t have genderqueer folk?” Cora asked, turning to Vetra.

“I don’t know what that word means,” Vetra said, “but if I’m following, then no. Not that I know of? We have female--short fringe, longer jawbones, able to bear children,” she explained to Jaal, “and male. A female turian can’t become pregnant without input from a male turian, generally in the form of sex. I’ve never heard of a turian who didn’t identify as one or the other, or whose identity differed from their biology.”

Jaal was very confused, but fascinated. The aliens--humans especially-- demonstrated a confusion about this gender concept that surprised him.  

“Another thing--among humans, at least-- which is--or was, for the most part-- connected with stereotypes of gender is who you can have relationships with.” Cora tucked her hair behind her ear. “For a very long time in most human societies before we became space-faring, only relationships between a man and woman were legally recognized.”

“Really?” asked Peebee. “That’s so weird.”

“You say ‘weird’, I say ‘messed up and mentally traumatizing when it’s not in the past for everyone’. You know. Potato, po-tah-to, vodka,” said Gil.

“That was associated with your _gender_?” asked Vetra incredulously.

“Yep.”

“But what do sex or relationships have to do with gender?” she asked.

The four humans exchanged looks. “Procreative relationships were prioritized above non-procreative ones?” guessed Gil.

“That’s an awfully salarian way to think of it,” Vetra muttered.

“Hey!” Kallo objected. Everyone looked at him. “I mean, it’s true, but you didn’t have to say it like that!”

“You’re right, Kallo. I apologize.”

Lexi straightened up. “Jaal, are we going too fast for you?”

Jaal hummed. “Let me see if I understand-- humans, turians, krogans, and salarians have two or more biological genders which are often tied to their role in reproduction, but one’s gender can have social expectations attached to it, expectations including with whom they can have a relationship?”

“That last bit’s not true with turians,” clarified Vetra.

“It’s definitely true with us, but I don’t know about the krogan,” said Kallo.

“Well, it all sounds shite if you put it that way,” grumbled Liam to the table.

“Liam, a lot of human socio-sexual history is shite,” Suvi said. “My parents raised my siblings and I as gender-neutral for that reason. They were both non-binary, and made clear to us the difference between gender identity and physiology. We all knew what others would assume based on our physical features, but decided for ourselves what we were, and how we wanted to be known.”

“How progressive for a human!” exclaimed PeeBee.

“And humans can choose their gender, if not their biology, and asari have one gender and reproduce with themselves without needing...another gender?” continued Jaal.

“Yep! We can reproduce with other species, too,” PeeBee said with a saucy wink. “The babies all come out asari, though.”

“How is it different for angara, Jaal?” asked Lexi.

Jaal shifted his weight as everyone focused again on him. “We… are angara. If you mate with someone and have a child, you are a mother as well as angara.”

“So, no male and female,” said Liam, “just mom and...not-mom?”

“Is there a special term for those who participate in the creation of a child, but do not bear it and become mothers?” asked Suvi.

Jaal nodded. “We have a word for it, but it’s not used much. And it has nothing to do with different body parts; just relationships.”

PeeBee frowned. “But you guys look different. Your head is bigger, and you’re taller than Governor Shie.”

Jaal frowned. “Yes? What is that supposed to mean?”

“I thought you were male--ooooh, now I’m doing it, and it’s not even my species’ stereotype!” PeeBee glared at Gil, who asked, “Why is it my fault?”

“I also assumed that the consistent physical distinctions between angara were a result of gender,” said Suvi. “The wider mantles on mal--er, on ones who look like you, Jaal, and the thicker ridges here,” she pointed behind Jaal’s neck, “as opposed to the smoother mantles and, well, more human-like curve from top of head to the back. Are you saying that--is there a lasting physical change when an angara gives birth?”

“Do your bodies not change when you bear children?”

“Well, yes, but only for the duration of the pregnancy.”

“Hmm. Well, Governor Shie is a mother, and you have met other mothers--”

Vetra interrupted him. “But you’re not a mother.”

“Oh, no! Not at all,” Jaal laughed. “But with angara, when one decides to become a mother, material from our mantle,” here Jaal touched the smooth ridges of flesh behind and around his head, “moves elsewhere to provide nutrition for the pup. Sometimes, if one does not become a mother again in a few years, our mantle re-forms and we recover our pre-maternal appearance. But once you are a mother, you are always a mother, no matter what you look like,” he stressed to them.

Jaal’s crewmates stood in thoughtful silence for a few minutes. The only sound came from the soft impacts on Lexi’s fingers on her pad as she typed notes.

“I have a question, but my social conditioning tells me it’s rude to ask,” said Suvi.

“Right, same,” said PeeBee, “only I don’t care about being rude. Jaal, do angara all have the same kinds of genitals?”

“Spirits, PeeBee!” Vetra exclaimed, slapping Gil’s back after he began choking on nothing.

Suvi’s eyes were very round. “I can’t believe you just asked that,” she whispered.

Jaal did not understand their reactions. “All angara have the same genitals for sexual stimulation, and unless there has been an illness or injury, all angara are equally capable of choosing to modify their reproductive system to become a mother. We all, as you might say, have the same equipment.”

“So many questions,” murmured PeeBee.

“I think you’ve asked enough,” said Lexi mildly. PeeBee responded by sticking out her tongue.

Silence ensued for a minute, and then was broken by Liam’s hand slapping the console, followed by SAM’s monotone reminder, “Only the Pathfinder is able to access AVP, Liam.”

Liam ignored SAM and exclaimed, “Now hang on a minute, Jaal-- I’ve heard you say ‘he’ and ‘she’ in reference to other angara, and ‘her’ and ‘his’!”

“Nuh-uh,” said PeeBee.

“Yeah, he has!” Liam insisted. Vetra and Suvi nodded their agreement.

“I do not understand,” said Jaal.

“You said we’d have to do a mission on Voeld or Havarl to impress Evfra, because ‘he’ didn’t trust easily.”

“Evfra does not trust easily. They--we--have good reason.”

“I’m not questioning the reason, just the use of the pronoun.”

“I heard ‘they’, not ‘he’,” said PeeBee.

“So did I,” Lexi added. “I’ve always heard ‘they’ and ‘theirs’ when Jaal refers to another angara without using their name.”

“Raise your hands if you’ve heard gendered pronouns from Jaal,” ordered Cora, raising her hand. Around the table, Liam, Gil, Vetra, Kallo, and Suvi raised their hands.

“All of you come from gendered societies where maternity is associated with the female gender,” observed Lexi.

“Are you saying our translators are editorializing what we hear in our heads based off of our preconceived notions of gender?” asked Cora. Gil and Suvi looked stunned. Jaal was not as adept at reading salarian expressions, but he thought Kallo, his eyes narrowed and hand holding his chin, looked thoughtful.

“You didn’t know?”

“How--” Liam began. He looked like someone had whacked him in the head. “How could we not have known this?”

PeeBee gestured to them. “It’s why you all use ‘she/her’ pronouns in reference to all asari-- because apparently, we all look female to you. Which makes sense with humans, because we share some outward secondary characteristics with them, but doesn’t make as much sense with you guys,” she said, pointing at Vetra and Kallo.

Liam still looked stunned, and his color was different than usual. Paler? “But if our translators are lying to us…” he trailed off.,

“They’re not ‘lying’, exactly,” PeeBee said. “They were programmed by people from your species who had your unconscious biases about gender, and the programming compensates for cultural differences by translating an alien word or concept to the most common analog in your language.”

“What.” Gil said.

“How did this not come up in my commando training?” asked Cora.

“Honestly, it’s not a big deal to most asari,” said Lexi. “We’re used to it. After first contact with the salarians we tried to make a distinction with limited success. The turians kept making the same mistake, so we basically decided to roll with it.” The humans stared at her. She blinked, and continued, “I can send you papers written by asari linguists on the subject, but they’re centuries old. Even more centuries than we usually mean, when referring to Milky Way things.”

“Ugh, don’t bore them,” groaned PeeBee. “Jaal, does it bother you if we call you ‘he’? Like, ‘Have you smelled Jaal today? Because he smells _nice’.”_

Jaal tilted his head, bemused. “Thank you. And no, because I didn’t hear anything different than what another angara would say. You can refer to me as ‘him’, since it sounds like that pronoun is most accurate, if you must use one at all.” Jaal looked across the table. “Liam? Are you unwell?”

Liam was no longer visible, sitting on the floor with his back to the table. Gil said, “He’s fine. Just, uh, re-arranging our worldview.”

“It’s a lot to take in,” Suvi said, going to take a sip from her clearly empty mug, and sighing into it instead. “I mean, anytime you’re confronted with evidence that you’ve made an assumption and it’s totally wrong, it’s distressing, but the internal bias of our translators--the implications are enormous!”

“Did I miss a memo? Were we having a meeting?” asked Sara from behind Jaal. Everyone turned to face her, except for Liam and Gil, who had joined Liam on the floor.

“Naw, they’re just planning a surprise party for my birthday,” Drack rumbled. “Isn’t that right, kids?”

Jaal explained, “Your crew was telling me about gender in Milky Way species.”

“Our whole lives are a lie,” Liam said in a muffled voice.

“Not our whole lives, just our translators,” Gil added, equally muffled. “Which control everything in our lives.”

Vetra gestured at Kallo. “Should we be as distressed as they are?”

“I sure hope not,” Kallo replied.

“Gil’s also upset because he became aware of some unconscious biases he has,” added Cora.

“I didn’t _know_ ,” he wailed.

“Of course you didn’t! It’s an _unconscious_ bias. ‘Adapt and move on’-- it’s a huntress motto.”

“Oh…kay…” said Sara. “I’ll get the run-down from SAM later, but in the meantime, we have a nice, juicy ambush set up for some kett. Who wants to participate in the mayhem?”

“Fuck ye--OW!” Liam said as he stood up into the table ledge. “God _dammit_.”

“No mayhem if you’ve just given yourself a concussion,” ordered Lexi.

“I brought the intel, so I’m coming with,” declared Drack.

“Ok, so, Drack and… Jaal?” Sara looked at him hopefully.

Jaal smiled, his current sparkling with contentment. “It would be my pleasure.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I've been stewing over this for weeks, and I'm curious to see if it makes any sense *at all* to someone else, or whether I need to completely revamp this. 
> 
> I'm planning another story in the collection that will basically be Sara and Jaal exploring each others' bodies and sexualities, but I wanted to establish this first.
> 
> Comments--any commenta, even short ones!-- are greatly appreciated. <3


End file.
